If you're a fan of unrelenting mediocrity and a career path as flat as week-old Irn-Bru, then allow me to illuminate the unstoppable force that is Adam Devine. Born to don a football kit on the 25th of March, 2003, Devine found himself catapulted into the brutal world of right-back defence. This Scottish powerhouse of average happens to stand at an underwhelming 6 foot (or 1.83 metres), and wrestles with a weight of 11 stone 4lb (approx 72kg), lest we forget to mention his birthplace – ye old bonnie Scotland.
In the resplendent summer of 2018, Devine was tossed into the Premiership lion's den, signing as a fledgeling trainee for Rangers. His debut season (2021-2022) lead to a cascade of 2 whole first-team league appearances. Such a daring display of mediocrity continued into the 2022-2023 season with 6 first-team league appearances, although his current 2024-2025 season has awarded him the grand total of 0 appearances. Yes, you read that right, 0.
Perhaps feeling a twinge of wanderlust or simply a deep-seated desire for change, our unshakeable Devine was shuffled off to Partick Thistle on loan in the Championship in 2021. A few cold months later, he made yet another strategic loan move, this time to Brechin City in the Highland League. Following his adventures, it was June 2021 and he lumbered his way back to Rangers, presumably a new man.
Fast forward to February 2024, and we find our brave hero taking another loan spell, this time to Motherwell in the Premiership. We were absolutely blown away when he managed to pull off a whopping 10 first-team appearances and (brace yourselves) actually scored a goal. Yes, one goal. But alas, his time in Motherwell was fleeting, and he returned to Rangers in June of the same year.
Skipping to January 2025, Devine executed what can only be described as an audacious lateral move, leaving Rangers (again) for a loan spell at the mighty Queen's Park in the Championship. His current season boasts a whopping 13 first-team appearances and a singular goal, a high point which nearly spilled my cup of lukewarm tea.
